Sunday, January 14, 2007

On Mallard Fillmore

Read the post linked above by Chris Kelly. I think he says it better than I ever could. I have long wondered what qualified this duck to sit alongside Doonesbury on the comics and/or editorial page every day. I know, I know, Garry Trudeau can seem like a zoked-out '70s liberal more than a few times, but at least the commentary offers some sort of insight. Mallard Fillmore is the editorial cartoon equivalent of the aging jock who insists on wearing his letter jacket well into old age (despite rampant weight gain) and tries to score at high school reunions with the divorced former cheerleaders.

I'll probably get in some sort of trouble for this, but let's take a look at a few strips from the frist week of December 2006:

December 2, 2006: A righteous rant about prejudice against...dinosaurs??? Paging Dr. Freud???

Next, we have more whining about the "War on Christmas" (which I will now forever refer to as the War on Xmas, just for the heck of it).

And finally, let us never forget...what Japan did to us...what the hell am IK supposed to do with this, anyway??? Go beat up an Asian dude??? No thanks.

When a parody of a comic strip is almost indistinguishable from the actual strip, you should know there's a problem. From America: The Book by Jon Stewart et al:

I'm not sure what more there is to say about this strip. Looking at a list of his frequent targets, I get the image of an elderly conservative shut-in swatting at flies with his cane and calling them "damn commie flies." Anyone who actually likes this strip (a) will not have their mind changed by anything at all and (b) will become senile in the not-too-distant future.

It's not to say that I never ever agree on some level with what Mallard has to say, but it is rare. On occasion, he comes across as a Goldwater conservative, which doesn't bother me much, but those times are few and far between. Mostly, Mallard Fillmore comes across as a half-baked slipshod part of the media's willingness to provide even the most pathetic hacks (yes, I called someone names) a forum in the name of "balance." If Mallard and the above-linked hacks (I said it again, and I'll back it up) are the best modern "conservatism" has to offer...damn.

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